EP 73 Transforming Triggers Into Connection

Your partner says the wrong thing at the wrong moment, and suddenly you're gone. Throat tight. Breath held. The same fight you've been circling for years starting all over again. Inside the members-only episode, Barbara Collier gets personal. Two decades into her career as a trauma therapist, freshly divorced, she had decided she didn't care if she ever had sex again, until one question stopped her: is that actually true for me? She shares what she found when she followed it all the way into her own body, and the moment she realized her healing had stopped short of her pelvis. We get specific about the difference between your body's yes, no, and maybe and the "social yes" you were trained to give, the tiny signals your body sends before an argument ever starts, what to do when your partner is triggered and every instinct says run or fix it, why numbness is your body being efficient, and why your pleasure can become a compass back to health. Then, in Barbara's guest insert, she guides a short practice you can carry anywhere, in your car, at your desk, or in bed. When Dr. Saida opened her eyes afterward, the world felt "friendlier and less pokey." Barbara then shows how the same quality of attention can reach the places where pain lives, including the pelvis and old scar tissue. This is the piece you take with you the next time your body starts to brace.